Last week was one to write off as a bad week. Not only did the virus get us but I was struck by another of life's irritating little blows - did you know you don't win any prizes for second place? First place might have been, nae would have been life changing and exactly what is required right now but it's not to be. Or at least not quite yet. So, now that plan 'b' has failed it's back to plan 'a' which isn't bad either. It's just that when plan 'b' came along I realised it would have been better and I'm praying the good intentions and promises for the future will be forthcoming.

However, not wanting to dwell on things on Friday we dashed, en famille, albeit mostly severely under par, up north to grace a family party, spanning many generations, with our presence. Another snippet of wisdom.......don't drink when you have a virus - the feel better factor is all just a nasty trick played on you by the alcohol leaving you more easily affected at the time and suffering twice as much the next day. As always the older generation behaved charmingly, entertaining us all with nostalgia and funny family gossip and adventures, drinking to excess but still firmly within the bounds of manners and politeness. Whilst some of my own generation, yet again embarrassed themselves, their parents and others, leaving me wondering and worrying about the future of the entente cordiale forged for generations before us. The younger generation no-doubt taking notes and forming their own opinions (but at least having the maturity to keep those to themselves). That aside, I think we all had a lovely time and in the end highland hospitality was again the main winner.

Autum is a beautiful season up north. The weather on Saturday was fantastic and several forages into the colour changing woods reminded us that city living is definitely becoming a less and less attractive way of life as we age. Sitting outside the local Inn with friends, watching the sunset and the ever-changing colours in the sky over Loch Ness, was spoilt only by the music from the nearby marquee set up for a firework display event. Nonetheless, if you block that out and tollerate that it was all for a good cause, it is the view that lingers in the memory - although I totally blame the virus for leaving my camera behind this weekend!

An early start and it was back to Edinburgh to the Monet exhibition - tickets originally bought months ago on the basis that it would be a quiet weekend. It is always so hard to leave somewhere when the weather is glorious and the colours stimulate your eyes to new heights. The exhibition was everything I thought it would be - including the crowds. But I had prepared myself that there would still be hundreds of people some eagre, some less so, milling infront of me and spoiling what I would have loved to be a private viewing. The paintings were from a specific period mainly 1879 - 1901 and I never cease to get a thrill from seeing the real thing close up. Knowing how prolific Monet was in producing work (sometimes up to four or five paintings a week!) has me trembling with guilt at my very brief attempts to get my paints out. But the brush strokes and the movement of the paint, added to the wonderfully clever lighting effects leaves me full of admiration for an artist I know is not everyone's favourite but whom I have the greatest respect for. Sitting in the middle of just one of the rooms, we worked out that we were surrounded by about three hundred million pounds worth of art. It was awe-inspiring.

And now I'm here, surrounded by piles of ironing, unpacking to do and a Sunday dinner yet to cook. I am behind in the work I have dutifully carried all over the countryside with me this weekend but without a chance to even begin it. The consequences of me not doing it could be disasterous for tomorrow - but in the scale of what? I am very tempted to ignore it all. Who would even notice? And if they did, what would the consequences of that be? I have spent too many years worrying about the "customers" I would be letting down, when in actual fact I no longer feel like taking the responsibility for the things which are ultimately not my responsibility. It's not me who should be doing the worrying, it's the people who are being paid at least twice as much as me. So sack me! I have a life still. This is my free time.

Again, this weekend has been a reminder that life is too precious and short to spend all your time worrying about the things you don't get the time to do properly. My task list at work is now too long for me to even bother looking at it, some single tasks on it will take weeks alone to complete and that is if all my time was devoted to just one thing. I wonder if you can sue your employer for destroying your ability to concentrate for more that ten minutes on one thing at a time?

The exhibition was a nice start to the week. It's a busy week ahead but I'm not going to worry about it anymore. I'll do what I can and what I can't won't get done. Does anyone have a problem with that ?....

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